4 1/2 Months Later

Ethan and his cousin at my sister's wedding.

The fabrics for Avella's room.

Ethan and Trevan insisted on sleeping in boxes. They don't look very comfy to me, but they loved it. I think boxes are my boys favorite toys. Ethan already asked me if he could have all of the boxes from our hardwood to make a fort.

Trevan just adores his sister. And yes, I know this picture is old.

We are finishing our basement right now and doing renovations to the main floor. I went to upload new pictures tonight and I realized I couldn't because my desk is partially buried in the garage. I had promised my mom (for like the third time) that I would do a new post. So here you go mom. :)

Avella is now 4 1/2 months old.

She weighs 10 pounds 4 ounces. She has officially tripled her birth weight! It's crazy to picture her one third of her size. She no longer has to have a bottle with the Neosure added to it anymore. She is still on iron, vitamin drops, and Prevacid. It does seem like she has been less spitty lately. Here's to hoping it lasts.

She rolled over today for the first time from her tummy to her back. I was so excited I was clapping and cheering. She looked at me like I was crazy.

Her eyelashes are starting to grow in long and dark.

I think her cheeks are chubbier than ever. Seriously. I promise I will post new pictures!

She is the happiest baby I've ever met. My boys were both mellow calm babies, but she is just so happy all of the time. I think she had such a hard start in life that now she is just so happy to be with her family all of the time. And so are we.

Her pediatrician visit last week went well. Her Dr. was so impressed with how she was interacting with him. She was making eye contact and smiling and cooing. He said that was impressive for a 4 month old, and especially for a preemie 4 month old. Her fine motor skills are great too. She loves to grab her toys, clothes, and blankets - pretty much anything she can get her hands on. And of course she loves to chew on them.

Her eyes are still blue... for now. We'll see. I was sure Trevan's would stay blue. Now they're brown.

Well Mom, I hope this random post is enough to make you want to come visit. ;) I love you. :)

3 Months Later

Ethan and Trevan snuck out of bed one night to make us this special dinner. The note said "To Mom and Dad - Open paper". Inside it said "We love you Mom and Dad!" The note in front of the ice cream said "To Mom - Eat after food - From Ethan and Trevan". I teased them the next morning that I ate my ice cream before the food and I got in trouble with Trevan.

I can't believe I have two little men. They look so grown up in their suits. Can't you see them as future missionaries? They just need little name tags.

They wanted to do their Yoda pose. They crack me up.

Ethan was able to buy a jumprope at school for super cheap. I should have known it wouldn't be used the way it was intended to be most of the time. They also tried to use it as an Indiana Jones whip. And yes, I did put a stop to that.

She was still sick in this picture. :(

Avella is three months old today. I think it has felt like the longest three months of our lives. :)

She was sick this weekend, and yes I was so nervous. I didn't go to sleep Saturday night until three in the morning because I was so worried. She had a horrible barky cough, congestion, a fever, and she was achy. Her breathing sounded awful. I was reassured when Ryan gave her a blessing on Sunday and when we went to the doctor on Monday. They checked her oxygen levels and they were 100%. I was happy to hear it since that had been my biggest concern. She started doing better yesterday, and today she has been her normal smiley self.

She now weighs... (Are you ready for it?) 7 pounds 14 ounces! It is amazing to see how much she has grown. She has being cooing and smiling at us for the last month. She is such a happy baby. She loves to talk to Trevan, probably because he is always right in her face. Ethan told me he can't wait until she can crawl and walk. I think he might change his mind once she is getting into his Legos and Bakugans. :)

Home At Last

... and a post at last. Hopefully lots of pictures will make up for my lack of posts. :)

We "roomed in" with Avella right before we took her home. We had to stay for 12 hours with her still hooked up to all of the monitors. We couldn't see the screen, the nurses watched it in the nursery. It was so weird not hearing constant beeping. And if you are thinking the room looks familiar... You are right! They put us in the same room that I was in for the two weeks before I had her. I just about had an anxiety attack when I walked back in that room. It brought back all of the feelings I had there, mainly the day I had her, it was a scary moment. I would be fine if I never walked in there again. :)

She weighed 5 pounds 3 ounces when we left.

Her first picture with no wires or tubes!

She is finally starting to look and act like a newborn. We have entered a whole new phase and it is so fun!

Avella came home on March 13th! We are so excited to finally be home together as a family. Ethan and Trevan LOVE their baby sister. I thought the excitement would wear off after a while, but she is still the most exciting thing in the house.

The night we brought her home the boys slept by her bassinet up in our room. Ethan woke me up in the middle of the night in between her feedings and said, "Mom Avella has a dirty diaper she needs it changed." He also woke up and helped me with each of her feedings. It was so sweet. Monday he told me, "Mom, if a rock was going to fall and crush Avella, I would save her and I would die." I could have cried. It was sweet to see him express how much he loved her. Trevan heard Ethan say that, and the next day he told me the same thing. Cute boys.

Trevan kept bringing blankets to whoever was holding her Sunday night saying, "She's cold, she needs another blanket." And if he noticed it wasn't on her a while later he would insist she was cold and needed another one. The first thing Trevan does when he wakes up is say hello to Avella. He loves to touch her cheeks and he says they are "so cute". If only he realized he has those same adorable cheeks.

It is so fun to see how much they love and adore her. I'm happy she has two brothers who will always be looking out for her.

She came home needing oxygen when she ate. She is now totally off of oxygen and doing well. At her doctors appointment on March 23rd she weighed 5 pounds 10 ounces. She gained 7 ounces in one week which is pretty impressive.

When we brought her home it felt like a normal birth would have felt. It is like starting over and it's as if we just had her. My body was finally to the point that it felt about what it would have felt like had I just had a baby. And we had to get used to the schedule Avella wanted to be on which meant we were up a lot at night just like any normal birth when you first bring baby home. And we are loving every second of it. It is so nice to feel like things are finally back to normal. I love being home and not going to the hospital every day. I had been there every day from January 21st until we brought her home on the March 13th. People have asked if I'm going crazy being stuck at home. No, I love that I can't go anywhere and I get to be with my family all day. :)

It is crazy to think that today was my due date and in four days she will be two months old. The weirdest thing is holding her and trying to imagine her still in my tummy. I guess I should be grateful my face and ankles never got chubby. I suppose there were good things that came out of this. :)

Tidbits

I love how she looks like she just passed out.

She had just finished eating a huge meal and she was wiped out. We picked

up her arms and legs and she just let them flop back down. She was "milk drunk". :)

She is so cute with her little body pillow.

Her first day in a big girl bed! She was finally able to keep herself warm.

Tidbits...

When Avella was born she had swallowed some of the blood from the placenta detaching. Scary. They told me she came out crying and kicking.

I didn't get to see her until the evening of the 6th.

I first saw her open her eyes on the 8th. I think this was also the first day that she cried (since the day she was born). She was finally able to because she didn't have the breathing tube down her mouth, it was on her nose instead.

I got to hold her for the first time on my birthday the 9th. Finally I got the moment with her that I was expecting to having right at birth. It was the perfect birthday present. I could have held her all day, but they only let me for half an hour. Poor Ryan didn't get to hold her until the next day. What a nice hubby to let me hog her all to myself.

I changed her diaper for the first time on the 11th. Ryan thought I was crazy for doing it. I explained to him that I would gladly take any "normal" moment with my daughter. I still love doing it because I feel like it is one of the few "normal" things I get to do.

The 12th was the first time we were all together as a family. It was just for a couple of minutes while my boys were able to help wheel Avella up to the second floor nursery, but it was a wonderful moment.

She got taken off of oxygen on the 16th. She was off oxygen for one week. She got put back on it again, which is totally normal. They actually had warned me this would probably happen. When preemies start working hard at feeding sometimes they need extra help breathing. She got taken off again today and only needs it when she eats.

On the 19th Avella was wide awake and looked right at me for the first time. Sigh. :)

As of the 20th she had gained 5 ounces. On the 23rd she had officially gained one pound since birth. Yea! She ended up gaining a lot in those three days. She hit 5 pounds on March 8th. She looks so much bigger!

I have learned that I need to ask questions all of the time and keep asking what the next step is. I was asking the nurse when we would start weighing her before and after feedings to see how much she got. The nurse said I can ask to have it done. It wasn't ordered because they didn't want me getting discouraged that she wasn't getting a lot nursing. Of course I knew she was amazing and was doing better than they thought. :)

Then I asked to have her weighed after the next couple of feedings. They were so impressed with how well she did that they put it in her orders to be weighed each time I nursed her. After a couple of days she had a huge feeding where she nursed and got 52 ml, even though she was only being fed 37 ml through her feeding tube! I think she just wanted to show everyone what she was really capable of. Everyone was amazed. It was definitely a proud mommy moment.

She started off being able to nurse her once a day on the 13th, a non nutritive feed (meaning I pump first and then let her practice nursing), Then we went up to four feedings a day. Now all of her feedings are nursing or a bottle. It is so good to look back and see how much she has progressed, even though sometimes it feels like it is going so slowly. It is exciting to think of what amazing things she will do the next week. And one week we will get the news that she will get to come home!

Thank you again to everyone for all of your prayers and service. Avella is a healthy little girl and we are grateful for that. We can't wait for all of you to meet her!

Avella's birth

February 5, 2011

About 8:30 am I had this horrible pain in my lower right abdomen. My doctor and nurse (Becky) couldn't figure out what it was. It hurt so badly that I couldn't eat breakfast. They gave me a percocet and started an IV again.

At 11:40 I finally felt up to eating my breakfast. During those few hours I felt Avella completely turning. I took a few bites of breakfast and felt a big gush. I realized that today was the day. I called Becky and told her my water was leaking. Then I debated whether or not I should call Ryan. I decided to call him, and I told him what happened. He was in Sandy with his family and told me that he would drop the boys off at home and then come to the hospital. I told him to just leave the boys with his family and come straight to the hospital. He did, thank goodness. Right as I hung up the phone with Ryan, Becky came in the room. She lifted up the sheets to take a look and I could tell by the look on her face that something was wrong. She told me it wasn't my water leaking - it was blood. We found out afterward that the blood was from my placenta detatching.

She started calling nurses, paging the doctor, and getting my bed ready for transport. As she started pushing my bed toward the door I heard her say C-section to the doctor on the phone. What was happening started to sink in. I was trying to stay calm. I remember thinking that panicking would not help Avella. My body did start shaking and tears were coming, all while I focused on breathing. I remember as I was rushed down the hallway on my bed it seemed like there were so many visitors and nurses lining the hallway and staring at me as I was rushed by.
(Funny side note: At some point while being wheeled down the hallway I noticed a piece of Cisco equipment on the ceiling. I made a mental note to tell Ryan that the hospital did use Cisco equipment. He notices everywhere we go, because he manages Cisco accounts. I tease him that he is a nerd)

I was wheeled into the OR with nurses rushing all around me. The anesthesiologist started asking me questions and explaining what would happen. He told me they were going to have to put me under, because they didn't have time to do an epidural. He was so calm. It was reassuring to have someone so calm in the midst of organized chaos. A nurse started to prep my other arm for another IV. I asked her if she could numb it first. (It seems silly now, but I had some bad, painful experiences with IVs.) In case you're wondering Becky ended up doing my IV (Her IVs were the only ones that didn't end up going bad), and no, she didn't numb it first. :)

The next thing I knew my stomach was blocked from view and Becky was up by my head talking to me. She was holding a mask and telling me that I would fall asleep and then I would wake up and it would feel like it had only been a couple of minutes. All of a sudden I felt someone pinching the skin on my stomach really hard. I, panicking, asked "Are they cutting me open?! I'm still awake! Are they cutting me open?!" Becky reassured me they wouldn't until I was out. She put the mask on and a few seconds later I was out.

I woke up in the recovery room with Becky telling me that everything went well. I asked if Ryan was there. She said he was and that Avella was doing fine. She told me her weight and length, and then I asked if she had any hair. Ryan thought it hilarious that I was so concerned whether she had hair or not.

The next thing I remember was waking up in my room. Ryan came in and told me that Avella was doing great. He showed me pictures and a movie of her. The doctor came in later and told me that once he did the bikini cut he saw that my uterus was too small on the lower part to make another horizontal incision. He cut vertically and then realized she was turned (she had turned that morning), so he had to make an incision all the way up to the top of my uterus. He told me that because of the way the incision was done that in the future I would always have to have C-sections. I am still processing that lovely news.

Becky later told me that I had lost about half of my blood. When she had done my hematocrit earlier that morning it was 39. When they did it after delivery it was 22.3. The next morning it was 22.5. The following morning it measured 21. My doctor told me that once you hit 21 you are usually required to have a blood transfusion. We talked over the risks and benefits. I was concerned about the risks. He agreed with me and told me it was my decision. I decided against it. I was able to get up and walk each day without feeling lightheaded or dizzy. He said that it would take two to three months to build up my blood supply again.

I am felling much better now, two weeks later. It is all I can do each day to shower, dress, pump, eat, and go see Avella. I am still very sore from the C-section. I went from morphine to percocet to lortab, and now I am weening off of that. So there is definite improvement. I have days where I feel that I have more energy than the day before and I realize my hematocrit must be rising. It's good to be able to see the improvement over the last two weeks. I am hoping that the healing process will just keep accelerating.

More pictures!

I'm still too exhausted to do much posting, so I thought the

least I could do was post more pictures.

Enjoy!

Avella's temporary home.

Her first smile for the camera!

The boys during their window visit.
Trevan said, "Dad the pictures made her look big, but she's not. She's tiny!"

The sweet nurses let the boys push Avella to the other nursery.

They were so proud to help.

She opened her eyes and was wide awake for most of the ride.

Look at those chubby cheeks & the double chin!

She was so mad when the nurse made her have tummy

time today. She got up on her tippy toes with her

bum all the way in the air and looked like she was about

ready to crawl away. None of us could believe it.

The nurse put her back on her side because she was so upset

and Avella immediately calmed down. I couldn't help but laugh.

Ryan says he knows why she she is so strong willed.

What is that supposed to mean? ;)

Pictures!

Avella's first day of life.

She sleeps with her arms and legs up sometimes.

So tiny! Look at all of her tubes on the side.

I still can't believe how tiny she is.

Can you believe this picture? I think Ryan

could hold her in one hand.

She looks so peaceful here.

Our first family picture.

She was actually sucking on the pacifier. Good job Avella!

She was hooked up to more stuff today.

And she had a spinal tap. :(

All of this made her more agitated today. Since she had a hard day

they decided not do do anything to her all night. They just

want her to rest. I was glad to hear that.

She was much more relaxed later tonight.

I will post details of everything that happened this weekend. I have been too tired, in

too much pain, and busy. I lost about two liters blood. We are still holding off on a

blood transfusion, but we will see how I do each day. I am very worn out from losing

so much blood and from surgery. Even as I type this I am in pain. It will be a while

before I am feeling like myself. So please be patient with me.

I don't know if I will be up for visitors the remainder of my hospital stay. Please call first

if you are thinking of coming. I will most likely be coming home on Wednesday.

I don't know if I will be happy to be going home on my birthday, or if I will be so sad

because I'm leaving Avella at the hospital on my birthday. Hmm.

I just won't think about it until it happens.